Last night was supposed to be awesome. I was going to pick up Heaven after work and we were going to go home and as a family clean up our yard a little more. Oh No.
Well, for those of you that don't know, Heaven is my step-daughter, or she will be when her dad and I marry. Her mother passed away when she was 18 months old. So this has been a factor in mine and Toby's relationship. When we first started dating (2 years ago, 2 months after his wife passed) we did not have good responses. Everyone thought I was trying to play the mommy role and they thought he was using me for a rebound. WRONG!!! Two years later, here we are, in a loving wonderful relationship. And although his daughter is not technically mine, I wish she was. I look at her as my own. I love her as my own and I will NEVER treat my children any different from her. And whoever doesn't like it, well, they have either accepted or rejected it. Either way, it doesn't matter. We are still a family. No she doesn't live with us, but that's another story that I don't care to disclose online. Moving on...
So I go to pick Heaven up from Tammy's. Little did I know that Heaven had a playmate, who happened to be a little boy, over and she WAS NOT going with me. She isn't exactly used to having other kids around, so when there's one to play with, she likes to take full advantage of her situation. She knew all day long that I was coming to get her and that the little boy would be going home too. At six o'clock, it was a different story. I walked inside and told her she was coming to spend the night with Daddy and BB and she started screaming to the top of her lungs. "NO GOODBYE BB GOODBYE. I'M STAYING WITH NANA AND HAYDEN. GOODBYE! I HATE YOU GOODBYE."
Talk about a heartache. I have to remind myself....she's only three!! I hate you? Goodness. I was so shocked she acted that way. Yeah she's spoiled rotten and she will pitch a fitch with the quickness, but WOW I'm new to this. And she caught me by surprise. Toby was at home, so I had no backup in this. It was insane. I know she doesn't hate me, and Nana made her apologize because she knows "hate" is an ugly word, but WOW, I'm still shocked, and still a little nervous. But Nana said she's done this to her before also, so I shouldn't take it to heart. So Nana and I decided that she would bring Heaven over when Hayden went home. Well by 8 o'clock Hayden's parents had not come to pick him up, so we shall try again tonight. Don't get me wrong, we keep Heaven often, but her actions shocked me so much I had to write about it today. Maybe I should have just grabbed her up and put her in the car and shown her that you can't always have your way? It would have been a struggle, but I could have done it. She needs to learn that, but being the "stepmom" figure that I am, do I have a right to make decisions in order to teach her a life lesson? Well Toby will be with me tonight and Hayden shouldn't be there...so here we go again. I'm just praying she won't act out again. Give me some input please, even if you are a stranger, and let me know what you would have done in my situation? Would you have made her go? Just a little insight please.
No comments:
Post a Comment